And David was prospering in all His ways for the LORD was with him. When Saul saw that he was prospering greatly, he dreaded him.
1 Samuel 18:14-15
Saul had tasted of the LORD’s blessing but lost it because presumption and arrogance led him into disobedience. He acted like he was above the Law, that he could use his GOD-given authority for his own purposes. He assumed that because GOD chose him , he could do whatever he wanted and GOD would bless it.
When he sensed the True Spirit after GOD’s own heart in David and saw the blessings of obedience, it provoked him to jealousy and wrath, as if he could take back GOD’s blessing by force by getting rid of David. He wanted the credit and glory for himself and could not bear to share credit or see someone else blessed outside his control. He wanted to control the situation so all honor and glory would come to him, but GOD had taken it out of his hands and he just couldn’t stand it.
There will always be detractors and naysayers who are provoked to jealousy when they sense GOD’s presence and spirit in someone else’s life. Such people assume a place of spiritual and moral authority over those they consider “less” and cannot handle that GOD speaks to and blesses such people without their permission and say so, without going through them — as if GOD needs their permission to speak to or bless anyone. They spiritualize it and have every excuse in the book to justify what they are doing. They even demonize and blame the other person for being so prideful as to think they could personally hear from GOD or know what He is saying to them without their “expert” guidance and alleged “wisdom.” They have a savior complex on steroids but try to mask it with protests of “good intentions,” and “concern,” and assume the right of leadership because of their perceived superiority. They may even believe in their own sincerity, having deceived even themselves regarding their own innocence of any emotional violation.
Nonetheless, behind the facade, they subtly seek to control and manipulate things to convince said person of their own inferiority. Simple gratitude for any help given does not satisfy as they seek to hold that person under their thumb and demand a degree of indebtedness and subjection that amounts to abject humiliation and self-debasement. Any less and they hit back with accusations of sinful pride and disrespect, attempting to continually convince the person of their own inadequacy, without regard for the evidence of the person’s actual character or considering the possibility that their own insecurities just may be causing them to misinterpret that person’s actions or blind themselves to considering them in a good light. Instead they subtly insinuate in multiple ways, “You’d be nothing without me!”
They have an inordinate need to feel superior and be recognized as such, seeking excessive shows of emotional affection, mistaking simple gratitude and acts of service and kindness as lacking sincerity or heart; and refusing to hear suggestions that the misunderstandings come from different ways of expressing love and gratitude. Rather, they insist (angrily) that the person they have deemed in desperate need of their help and saving from self is completely lacking in decency and has nothing good in their heart at all. For all intents and purposes, they deem this person irredeemable, morally deficient and beyond the help they have “so graciously” offered and refuse to hear or consider any side of the story besides the one they have concocted in their own minds. They have pre-decided that they are all right and the other person is all wrong and are determined to be offended if that person dares to suggest even shared responsibility. It’s like their mission is to extract a confession of abject guilt and shame from this person and nothing less will do, so like Saul seeking David’s life, they come at the person with fiery darts, put downs, misguided or false accusations, all to attempt to destroy a person’s notions of equality in the eyes of GOD and confidence in their identity in who GOD made them to be and ability for independent thought and wise decision making under GOD’s hand — just because it isn’t under their control.
TRUTH IN REAL LIFE: I need to shut my ears and my heart to such attempts at emotional manipulation. GOD alone is my ROCK, my SHIELD and my PROTECTOR. Only Him shall I fear, regardless of the threats and emotional blackmail leveled by some (not all, in fact, not most of the people who are helping us through our difficulties are guilty of these tactics.) To the LORD belong escapes from death and our deliverance and salvation lies only in Him, not in dancing to the manipulators’ tune and letting them define the rules of the game. I will play only by GOD’s rules! He is able to bless me without anyone’s help — and if He chooses to use anyone as His channel of blessing, it will come without the heavy dose of guilt, shame and manipulation on the side. Such are not the tactics of the good and loving heart of my LORD!
I believe with all my heart that YOU are able! Please show me the way through our difficulties on YOUR terms, according to YOUR plan — no one else’s!
In Jesus’ Name,
Be strong and courageous for the LORD your GOD will be with you wherever you go. Joshua 1:9
I am not ashamed for I know in Whom I have believed and am convinced that He is able to guard that which I have entrusted to Him until that day. 2 Timothy 1:12